Overcoming Fear of Rejection

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Summary

1. Acknowledge your Emotions. .Understanding what you are feeling is the first step to being able to take the necessary steps to learn from it and put into play the actions needed to come out ahead.

2. See rejection as proof that you are excelling and pushing the limits.  When people reject others for who they are or what they believe in, it is often from being ignorant or because they have been made uncomfortable.  This is a good sign that you are thinking at a higher level or venturing outside the norms.  This is good, this leads to growth and new discoveries.

3. Feel compassion for yourself. Understand that this is a process and rejection is part of it.  Do not be overly critical of yourself or your hurdles.  Giving permission to learn and fail along the way.

4. Rejection does not become who you are.  Believe in yourself and your dreams and goals.  Your vision is what defines you, not the rejection from others.

5. Rejection is a tool learned through the rejection of others.  Rejection is not a negative, it is just one more way to learn what to do differently the next time or to learn what their community needs from them.

 We all have to deal with rejection and how we choose to deal with it is a large part of defining how successful, strong and resilient we are.

Full Transcript

You are amazing…yet sometimes you forget and you let other people get in your head.  Never apologize for being you.

I am Leigh Wilson and this is Focus Forward Business Design.

Over the years of coaching people in different arenas of their life, whether it be business development or personal growth one of the things that always surprised me is how often an amazing coaching session goes with goals and challenges set that will take an individual to a new level, just to have them lack the success that they could have otherwise had because of a fear of being rejected.  It is not because they are not excited about the prospect of the new challenges and the opportunities that it will inevitably bring, it is truly the fear of others either poo pooing them or flat out rejecting their thoughts, ideas or product.

These are people just like you that bring an amazing service to your world but are afraid to share it because a certain percentage of the population will not stand behind it and in fact may even criticize them for thinking on a higher level.

How many dreams and goals have been quit before they ever got off the ground because the fear of being rejected stopped them?  Too many is how many.  People, unfortunately, convince themselves that the world will not support them.  This may come from previous rejections, lack of belief in themselves or their mission.  Whatever the cause it needs to be overcome so that you can grow and learn and give back at a level that you dream of.

What is that passion that you have not explored at a deep level as you are afraid of rejection?  What is the worst that can happen?  Someone doesn’t believe in you…maybe.  It is not the world's job to be our cheerleader and I don’t mean to sound harsh, but think about it, we motivate ourselves through our visions and our capacity to live large.  Those closest to you will support you and the hell with the rest.

Here is the truth though…rejection that impacts your life on a long term scale happens rarely.  True fact.  Think about it.  How many times in your life have you been rejected so hurtfully that it caused a change in who you are or what you believe in?  Once, twice maybe three times, maybe even 5 times.  We are living with a fear that rarely presents itself. So that means that out of the thousands of people that you have interacted with a tiny tiny amount…literally a flyspeck has rejected you and the rest either accepted you or didn’t care.

We as people are so incredibly strong mentally, but we don’t allow ourselves to experience or show that strength in a way that overcomes those doubts of who we are and what we can be.  We tell ourselves that we are not good enough and that people will not believe in us, yet 5 or 6 out of thousands are going to reject us.

We need to have a higher expectation of ourselves and not use fear as an excuse.  Be who you are….express what you feel…build your dreams and be ok with those that reject your ideas and embrace those who want to see you succeed.  

We owe it to our communities to share what we know and what we are building and by cowering to the fear of rejection we are withholding great things from those who need it most.  Be ok with those few critics.  Why do we let them take up space in our heads…you are better than that.

I am going to give you 5 ways that the highest achievers use rejection to become the best version of themselves.

1. They Acknowledge Their Emotions….Understanding what they are feeling is the first step to being able to take the necessary steps to learn from it and put into play the actions needed to come out ahead.
2. They see Rejection as proof that they are excelling and pushing the limits.  When people reject others for who they are or what they believe in, it is often from being ignorant or because they have been made uncomfortable.  This is a good sign that you are thinking at a higher level or venturing outside the norms.  This is good, this leads to growth and new discoveries.
3.  They feel compassion for themselves – They understand that this is a process and rejection is part of it.  Being overly critical of themselves or their hurdles is like self rejection and that is not ok.  Giving themselves permission to learn and fail along the way is part of the process.
4. Rejection does not become who they are.  They believe in themselves and their dreams and goals.  The vision that they have built is what defines them, not the rejection from others.
5. Rejection is a tool – they learn about themselves through the rejection of others.  They learn what they may need to do differently…or not through the rejection of others.  Rejection is not a negative in their world, it is just one more way to learn what to do differently the next time or to learn what their community needs from them.

I hope that this has proven helpful for you.  We all have to deal with rejection and how we choose to deal with it is a large part of defining how successful, strong and resilient we are.

Please share this with someone that you feel could use this in taking their next step and of course please like below to help us out.

If you would like to go to the next level and dig deeper into taking your life and your career to a higher level, click below for your complimentary 1:1 strategy session with your own Focus Forward Coach and remember it is always your choice to Focus Forward.