Borrowed Ladders...Climbing Someone Else's Version of Success

Borrowed Ladders: Climbing Someone Else’s Version of Success

Have you ever been working like crazy — checking the boxes, hitting milestones, pushing hard toward a goal — only to finally get there and feel… flat? Almost disappointed?

That’s what I call climbing a borrowed ladder.

You’re putting in all the effort, all the hustle, but the ladder you’re on is propped against someone else’s wall. And when you finally reach the top, you realize it’s not even where you wanted to go.

And here’s the truth: so many business owners are doing exactly that. Maybe even you.

The Trap of Borrowed Success

I once worked with a client who was laser-focused on hitting the magic seven-figure mark. Every conversation, every strategy session circled back to “million-dollar business.”

Now, don’t get me wrong — scaling to seven figures can be an incredible goal. But when we unpacked what they really wanted, the picture was different.

They didn’t dream of running multiple locations or managing a huge team. What they truly wanted was freedom:

• More time with their family

• Space to unplug without guilt

• A business that supported their life instead of consuming it

But because they had borrowed the industry’s definition of “success,” they were burning out. On the outside, it looked like they were crushing it. Inside, they were exhausted, frustrated, and unfulfilled.

That’s the danger of climbing a borrowed ladder.

Where Borrowed Ladders Come From

The influences are everywhere:

• Family expectations. Maybe your parents always pushed for a “safe” career path.

• Social media. Those highlight reels full of launches, vacations, and luxury offices can set false benchmarks.

• Industry trends. Phrases like “scale fast or die” can trick us into thinking there’s only one way forward.

• Mentors. Even well-meaning advisors can steer you toward their version of success instead of yours.

None of these influences are “bad.” But if you never stop to ask, “Do I actually want this?” you can spend years climbing toward a destination that doesn’t even belong to you.

Signs You’re On a Borrowed Ladder

How do you know if you’re climbing the wrong wall? Here are three red flags:

1. You hit milestones… and feel nothing. Instead of excitement, it’s a shrug.

2. You’re busy but not fulfilled. Your calendar is full, but your energy is empty.

3. You keep chasing “there.” Every time you get close, the finish line moves further away.

If you’ve ever thought, “I’m doing everything right, so why doesn’t this feel right?” — that’s the sign. It’s not failure. It’s misalignment.

Reclaiming Your Ladder

So how do you stop climbing someone else’s ladder and start building your own?

Here’s the reset I walk my clients through:

1. Spot the Source

Whose voice is behind your goal? Is it yours, or does it belong to family, mentors, peers, or competitors?

2. Check the Wall

If you reached this goal, would you love the life on the other side? Or would it just look good on paper?

3. Design Your Own Ladder

Write down what success looks like for you. Not the Instagram version — the real one. Maybe it’s:

• A specific income number

• 20-hour workweeks with Fridays off

• A month-long vacation every summer

There’s no wrong answer — except the one that isn’t truly yours.

Your Challenge

Take ten minutes today to audit your ladder. Write down your top three goals — around money, time, and reputation. Then ask: Are these really mine, or did I borrow them?

If they’re borrowed, give yourself permission to put them down and start fresh.

Because success isn’t about climbing the fastest ladder or the tallest ladder. It’s about climbing the right ladder — the one that leads to the life and business you actually want.

Focus Forward

This is the heart of my work with entrepreneurs: helping you reclaim your ladder and build a business that gives you both growth and freedom.

When you’re ready to redesign your ladder, that’s exactly what we do — step by step, Focus Forward.